Silvio Berlusconi Strikes back

A day after Silvio Berlusconi was sentenced to four years, reduced to one, he has decided to reassure the fans of bunga bunga parties the world over that he will stay in politics.

Determined to 'right the wrongs' in the justice system he will make sure that what happened to him won't happen to other 'innocent' citizens...So let me get this straight... he feels aggrieved, hard done by and like the Erin Brockovich of Italian politics... 

This is a man who is also being investigated for soliciting sex with a underage girl, a man who has been charged with numerous allegations and always walked away.. the man is a legal teflon. Sometimes he has not got off due to acquittal but rather that the trial exceeded a time period and the case was dismissed automatically. So now I ask you, while some celebrate the victory of a conviction what has actually been achieved?

Well he was sentenced to four years - that was immediately reduced to one through some amnesty law that only the Italian judicial system can seem to understand and ordered to pay 10m euros in damages... for what amounts quite simply to tax evasion... so has he been carted off to the lock up? of course not, cause he's appealing... and the appeal process that could take several years, which on a probable note means he will never serve the sentence... Also he was banned from office for  5years... but does this mean that this ban is also suspended? could he realistically return to office, where the Prime Minister cannot be found guilty of any crimes and get off again? It seems that in Italy the Magna Carta was never translated!

So what we have now is a man, who has been found guilty, probably not going to serve his sentence and being encouraged to re-enter politics to right some  wrong he feels he has been served?  He feels he has been persecuted by the judges that tried him... which I'm pretty sure is how anyone feels when they get sentenced to jail.  

The only brightside I can see to this is that without a man like Berlusconi, the only clowns left to blog about would be in the circus.

      

Weekly Wombat (Since last time to 17/10/12)

So it's been another period of time since the last weekly wombat and here goes...

In the news this week Police taser a blind man while looking for a samurai, a man cooks a squirrel burns down a block of flats and Obama gets some balls!!!

1) In a time in England where the police needs a bit of a PR boost after the controversies of the cover-ups of the Hillsborough disaster and the apparent reports of Jimmy Saville's pedophilic activities not benig followed up the police needed a positive story ... so when reports of a samurai pacing the streets of Chorley in north west England came through the police burst into action. What they didn't need was to end up tasering a 61 year old blind man mistaking his white stick for a samurai sword...

If it wasn't so tragic you'd laugh... however what ended up happening was so distressing that it defies any possible belief... a man, who has suffered two strokes and cannot see anything was suddenly struck by something he described as feeling like a shock from an electric pylon, was tasered by a police officer who could not distinguish the difference between a sword and a white stick!!!

later a man was arrested for carrying the sword... but seriously... can we start testing for common sense soon?

2) and now in America... continuing the theme of animals from last week and common sense - a man found some roadkill in the form of a squirrel and thought 'waste not want not' therefore deciding to take the rodent home and grill it... he used a propane blow torch to singe the fur but instead set fire to his apartment and damaged a total of 8..

in a time of austerity and financial constraints I'm sure everyone in that block of flats was delighted to see the 'new gordon ramsey' save the pennies, grab a dead rat thing and set fire to their homes...

I now endorse McDonalds over roadkill... and that's saying something

3) And finally, if the reports are to be believed, the man we know President Obama decided to turn up for his second presidential debate... After Romney stormed it in the last it's nice to hear the Barack realised his 'I'm an insurance man and don't really care' routine wasn't working and decided to fight...

I was not polarised in this situation at all... until Romney started speaking and then I thought, wow... I really don't want to see America go back to the blunders of Bush or Righteous Regan eras...

I did however love Romey's 'binders full of women' comment - I love the idea that in his office Romney has binders full of women... what the fuck was he talking about? and where does he come up with this material? Cause he should bottle it and send it to some comics if he really is serious about being the President of the States...

I think... if Romney and Obama were in a head to head to see who could be the new Stand-Up sensation, then I'm afraid to say rollover Seinfeld... Romneys in town, Barack... you should just stick at being president... it's what you do best

John Terry - An Ambassador for England

I think that football sometimes reflects the make-up of society and can reflect the society it comes from when talking in the terms of national teams. This is not a football blog but it seems to be the second post in as many weeks that focus on the subject. This is cause, quite simply, even though we're pretty crap on the national level, football is a pretty major passion in England.

The national team is seen to be representative of the culture that it comes from, however in the case of Asian footballers we have none in the current national team... and the only player of Asian origin to play for England was Frank Soo who played during the war... even though Asian people make up 7% of the British population... but anyway this post is not about the genetic make-up of the England team ... it is in fact about John George Terry...

John Terry is the captain of Chelsea football club and the ex-captain of the England national team. This means that at one point he was the most prominent ambassador for the English national football team - when we went to another country he was the first port of call, the front line man and the person we feel best represents our team... our leader.

He's been charged over the years with assault and proven innocent, parked his car in a disabled bay and accused of sleeping with his teammates girlfriend ... and he has not been tarred by any of it..,

Then he called Anton Ferdinand a "fucking black cunt". I have seen countless times f****** black c*** written in the papers, but lets not mince our words here cause the word I find most offensive is the one that they have left in... His defense is that he was asking Mr Ferdinand if he had thought he'd called him a "fucking black cunt", which seems about as plausible as Nicholas Cage winning an Oscar  Because the court could not establish the tone of Terry's voice he was again acquitted...

The English FA then tried Mr Terry and basically dismissed his defense as a load of bollocks and decided that the term 'fucking black cunt' had been used by way of an insult... so lets look at this... he used the term including the word 'black' to describe Mr Ferdinand's skin colour as way of an insult... however they did say that while he had racial abused Anton, he was not in fact a racist...

He was given a four match ban, a fine and sent on his way... and the fact he has been declared 'not a racist' means there is nothing to stop him from returning to play for England or evening managing a team in the premier league... This is in stark contrast to Luis Suarez who speaks Spanish calling a Frenchman 'negro' - which means black in Spanish and is commonly used in South America as a way of describing someone... After living in South America I can say that some of the things I heard felt pretty racist - for example to call some negro in Britain would be highly fucking offensive, but in Brazil if you called someone Preto (or black in Portuguese) this is very upsetting and racist for Brazilian people... Luis came from Uruguay and did not understand the language or the culture - I have corrected people, who's first language is not English, in the past who think that it is acceptable to call someone 'nigger' because they heard it in a rap song. These people simply do not know the difference... Luis however was given an 8 match ban....

John Terry did know the culture, he speaks English as a first language... he knows that the word black is offensive. If Anton was indeed being an idiot he might have been worthy of being called a fucking cunt, or a dickhead but it had nothing to do with the colour of his skin... I have met good people and pricks from all nationalities and ethnicities, but it has had nothing to do with where the are from... some people we simply don't like and when I choose to tell people they annoy me I don't feel the need to reference if they are white, black or green... it is inconsequential... to do this I feel would be racist - and I am not a racist person.

John Terry did do this and he too apparently is not racist - it's just his actions were a bit racist that day... if the circus that is football was truly representative of British society does this mean we would see criminals using the defense 'I'm not a rapist, I was just a bit rapey that day' or 'I'm not a murderer, but what I did was a bit stabby'. This idea that I'm not racist but one person is a 'fucking black cunt' seems to come straight from the Nick Griffin school of thinking when he called a pair of people Fenians, but does not mean it to imply to every Catholic...

Everyone has prejudices - the key to being a good person is not to be blinded by them and to give everyone an equal chance.

@roywoodhouse

Weekly Wombat (23/09/12 - 04/10/12) giving you more than 7 days!

This week on the weekly Wombat...

The Americans ask David Cameron whether the Magna Carta is overrated, Steve jobs is seen on a truck in China, Batman gets arrested and Obama makes Reagan MK2 look good...

1) On a recent trip to the US to boost tourism to the UK... cause in a time of economic woe most peoples first choice of destination would be the Island of Britain with its warm weather, sandy beaches and smiling natives... wait wait, I have dyslexia - I mean Bali... David Cameron decided to go on the Letterman show. It was there he was asked the million dollar question of is the Magna Carta really that important? In a time where current issues need addressing to save society as we know it it's great to see that the British Prime minister also has time to debate a burning issue and relevant question that started in 1215 with the signing of the document...

I would like to ask a question to Mr Letterman... who the fuck cares? seriously? I mean is there not some more serious issues that we should be discussing here? like... trillion dollar debts, over spending by banks, world poverty, climate change, racism, sexism, the struggle for equality... no wait, the signing of the Magna Carta and it's significance on modern society is way more important... thanks David Letterman and David Cameron for putting life into perspective...

The Magna Carta states that no one person is above the law, not even the king... so arrest the bankers and the people who fucked it all up in the first place then... but seriously there are far more important things to discuss as whether the Magna Carta is relevant today...

2) Ok so this is a weird one... the late Steve Jobs was seen on the back of a truck in China.. The snap (seen below) started an internet phenomenon...

After Jesus on toast, Mary on a cloth and Chairman Mao was seen on the moon it was only a matter of time before Steve Jobs was seen on a truck in China... people are debating whether Jobs has been reincarnated and wearing a turtleneck and holding his chin in China, or whether it is a waxwork or even a cutout or a doctored photo... It could indeed mean that Apple has moved on from Ipads and started making Ipeople that can be 'recharged' - one thing is for sure... this changes everything

3) What is the world coming to when you can't dress up like a complete tosser, try and solve crime without being arrested... Well it turns out that we do in fact live in this world...

and here he is... having traded Gotham for Michigan has now been arrested twice for getting in the way of solving crime. I happen to love these people who try and solve crime dressed up in homemade costumes, they even have one in Sao Paulo, Brasil, and think that anyone who tries to make a difference for the better deserves a little bit of recognition ... So well done Mark Wayne Williams from Michigan... but if you happen to be somewhere where the police don't want you to be - like a crime scene where they are trying to use sniffer dogs who are getting distracted by your scent, go and grab a coffee in the bat cave, cause if you go to jail you can't do much good in there - and I'm not sure quite how long you'd last... everyone can help someone everyday... you don't need to beat up a mugger, just help and old person cross a road or buy a homeless person a coffee.. and luckily you don't need to dress up like a prick to do it :)

4) and finally! Obama and Romney took to the stand and in what was expected to be a political KO for Romney made Obama look about as passionate as an insurance salesman... Please Barack ... tell me this was some sort of mercy, that you didn't want a landslide victory that made you look too good... cause Romney seems to be the most scary candidate since Reagan.  When Reagan was in power with his finger on the button not just the enemies of America cowered... the world went running... so please Barack, get your head in the game... stop telling people that you were not the perfect president, that you will not again be a perfect president and start saying come on... look at him... then think 'it could be worse'... either that or why not debate over the relevance of the Magna Carta cause that seems like a pretty hot topic right now and take Rommey to the cleaners... I have one more suggestion... if you want another term power... forget the promises and the rhetoric, just offer to release the files displaying the truth about the Kennedy assassination.... Bribery will get you everywhere...

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Twitter - Griffin-style

I have a love/hate relationship with twitter... on one hand it's great way for great, interesting and funny people  to share 140 characters and letters with other people in the hope of attracting other peoples attention to legally stalk them... in fact of all stalking techniques twitter is the greatest... so if you fancy stalking me - @RoyWoodhouse

On the other hand is a way for less great people to also share their views in 140 characters... step forward Nick Griffin. (for anyone who doesn't know he is the leader of the British National Party - which is a right wing party in Britain that promotes anti-immigration and has 'in the past' supported white nationalism and tend to be anti-Islam) In other words the BNP seemingly stands for everything that Citizen Wombat opposes.

It's not to be said the party is in itself racist... as has often been denied by Griffin (I usually put a Mr in front but I thought I'd miss it out this time), it's just ironically it seems to attract white skinheads who have a tendency to fear anything other than what they know and have put the word Islamaphobia in the English dictionary - oh and I hate this fucking diagram with the brains showing White, Black and Asian brains all the same size and a tiny racist brain... The reason I hate this is cause racists aren't going to get the metaphor - and it's not the truth - they just don't use their brains as well as the rest of us... so I think the advert should read more like "Racists are retarded and/or cunts" (I was going to put an asterix in cunt, but then I didn't want anyone to take that wrong)

Back to Griffin. The other day he decided to turn up in Northern Ireland during the Unionist Parade (called the Orange Men) who are pro-Great Britain. Now what a truly amazing man to turn up and add his weight to this rather volatile situation - which in this case is a little bit like throwing a very fat tank of fuel onto a bonfire next to a petrol station in the middle of the Kuwait oil fields... so thanks for going to that! He did say "Obviously there was no connection between the British National Party and the organisers of the parade, I was there as a member of the public." which to me sounds like no-one fucking wanted him there...

On another level he said "I had one long ten-minute discussion with an Orangeman who didn't agree with me. We had a good discussion and we shook hands at the end of it," which on another level says that while the other guy didn't agree with him the Northern Irishman was a polite man.

"Everybody else that I met either just said I had a right to be there or wanted photographs taken and autographs" was by far the highlight of my read of what he said ...  Look at the picture above - I don't think I'd recognise him in a crowd... let alone walk over to him and ask him for his autograph... we're not talking Brad Pitt or George Clooney here.. I'd struggle to pick the politician out, who is blind in one eye like a proper bond villain, in a line up of five men... which again shows me that either the Northern Irish have a fantastic knowledge of British politicians faces or this comment is full of shit.

Anyway I have gone off topic... cause the reason for this blog is that after receiving comments on twitter from a couple of Republicans (Pro-unified Ireland) about his lack of welcome in the Emerald Isle he decided to use the word Fenian to describe them. Fenian for anyone who doesn't know is a incredibly offensive term for a Catholic and should never be used, and if you do know it I hope you've never used it in an aggressive or abusive manner... if you have click the little x in the top right hand corner of this screen, never come back here and then promptly go fuck yourself.

Since calls of inspiring racial hatred have fallen on deaf ears I feel the need to say that to use a derogatory term to describe someone of a different faith or appearance to yourself is indeed racism and when you do it on a social media platform like twitter is it not inspiring others to feel the same?

Anyway he decides that upon a bit of pressure that he will not be taking his comments down, which is nice to know he sticks to his bile, and that he used the term Fenian just for these two people and not to describe Catholics in general.... so below I have the quick...

Nick Griffin Guide to Casual Racism

1) Find someone you don't like
2) Find a way to describe them in a derogatory way
3) Say you don't describe everyone in the same way and just use it for said target

cause for Griffin it isn't racism if you only use it selectively...

For anyone that thinks the same as this bile... please again look to the little x at the top right....