Wednesday, 13 October 2010

Modern worker seeking justification for healthy living and maybe more...

Up and down the countries of the world, millions people are forced to spend hours upon hours in dark, windowless environments restricted to nothing more than repeating themselves time and time again and wearing ridiculous head garments. These ill-fated individuals are known simply as call centre operatives...

Many of these lost souls have forgotten there used to be an outside world! Once shown a picture of a tree, one call centre operative simply replied "what is that?". Their eyes have adapted to the point where most now have more genetically in common with moles than they do with the rest of humanity. Limited to including 'buzz' words such as fantastic, awesome and brilliant to increase sales most can no longer function in such a cynical society. Many are not even allowed the simple delights offered by the internet and without Facebook have forgotten the parents, loved ones and friends they left behind.

For just two pounds a month...

As for 'not so' Great Britain, our national industries of steel and coal have disintegrated into a distant memory. It seems now our national export are our words down a headset supplying second rate car insurance quotes to people who don't really need them. And all to the words "smile and dial" - the mantra of the telesales person

And for what? Solely to keep the capitalist machine in business. I sit here now wondering if in fact 'The Terminator' was less a sci-fi horror movie forging an epically long and uncomfortably sex scene, a naked Austrian body builder and adding a slice of mass murdering robots from the future and more a grim metaphor for the future of our world! We have created a machine, a capitalist engine that has enslaved humanity and forced us to whittle away the best years of our lives feeding the beast by invading our the homes of unsuspecting cold call victims to convince them to upgrade their phone contract, buy Viagra or save the planet by sponsoring a donkey in Botswana to name but a few.

I like to take the innocent view that James Cameron was less prophet, more directorial wizard. It seems no what job you end up doing in such a varied society you can't avoid having a phone plastered to your head and pestering someone. Take my 9-5 (that turns into an 8-6 on a regular basis) job - A business development manager in a recruitment consultancy - sounds fancy, but at the end of the way what it entails is me endlessly calling people in offices around the country finding out new ways to piss them off before they say yes. In 12 years of working I have never once not had a phone, overflowing email box or stack of paper that tries to eat me every time I edge toward my desk. I have come full circle.

So what now for the future? The more the machines take over, the more call centres will spring up and begin to ingest the populace to the point where there are no more normal people left on the streets, in the homes or parks of the world. What then? Why call centres will simply start calling other call centres, demanding to speak to the best person, or offering better headsets and pictures of trees. Soon people will start living in the centres, giving birth to their broods ready to boost the work force and dying in the very seat they gave their life to. Scientists will endeavour to invent cybernetic augmentations that allow in built diallers direct inside our brains so that we never have to disconnect from the server. We are cogs in the machine and we must keep selling - but don't worry for life is doubleplusgood.

And this is the nightmare, a dystopian imaging that would make Orwell piss himself.

But how can we stop this?! Look for a job that doesn't describe harassment as cold calling or badgering as positive sales techniques.  Do not be seduced by the generous basic and OTE that will almost double your salaries. Yes, you may be able to afford the things that get offered down your phones, but for Gods sake think of your children!

Call centre workers of the world unite! Lay down your headsets, hand up your phones and let the lines go dead...

"If you're listening to this, you are the resistance"
(John Connor)

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